Paris Hilton is apparently still shopping around, even though in a previous article, barely a week ago, Paris was running around with a moron from Australia, Tyler Atkins, t-shirt designer and apparently, amateur pharmacist.
Who’s the lucky guy this week? Cisco Adler; sloppy seconds of Mischa Barton, and grunge-o extraordinaire. The guy just looks plain dirty. Cisco and Paris were making out at Guy’s karaoke night on Tuesday. She even gave him a lap dance. And the disgusting display of PDA doesn’t stop there. When Paris wasn’t drooling all over Cisco in the booth, Paris horrified the crowd by “singing”, “Bette Davis Eyes,” followed by a medley of her hit “Stars are Blind.” Well, I think anyone would have to be, to make out with either of those two. Or at least equipped a strong gag reflex, and a heavy duty immune system.
Tom Cruise tries to “dance” with Katie Holmes at Beckham’s Bash.
Beyonce falls down the stairs, but manages to go on lip syncing! Watch the video!
Britney Spears flips out on a photographer on video! Wanna see?
Friend of Paris Hilton, Kim Kardashian is trying to keep up with her pal in the skeeze department!
Amy Winehouse acts like a total crackhead in front of audience.
Paris Hilton’s rumoured new boyfriend, Tyler Atkins, has what the French call, that certain je ne se quois… Down’s Syndrome. He’s a T-shirt designer from Australia, and the two were spotted canoodling and making out in Malibu last weekend. Of course, just because Paris is making out with a guy, doesn’t mean she’s dating him. He could just be playing a role in one of her more famous movies, i.e. 1 Night In Paris.
Last month, Tyler was interviewed, and told a story about how a very famous girl hooked up with him, and then drugged him, and brought him back home to fornicate with him. With company, according to his story:
“She’s like a full pill-popper … she brought out these pills and because I was drunk I went, ‘Yeah, fuck it - I’ll just have one. Why not? And she gave me like four of these pills that were like Vicodin; they were like Rohypnols or something. Heavy, heavy.”
“And she drugged me, this famous chick. … I woke up in her spa bath with her and her best friend. We were in the spa bath, full-on threesome.”
“I couldn’t find my clothes. I got dropped down on Sunset Blvd. … I had no minutes left on my phone, so I couldn’t call anyone. Looking like a freak in girls’ clothes.”
If you were ever looking for a living thing (no, plants and vegetables don’t count) to compare Paris Hilton’s level of intellect to, her new boyfriend makes her look like a member of the NASA research team.
Satisfy your morbid curiosity and see Paris Hilton’s new, special friend in action in the above mentioned video interview.
