I can’t believe that Michael Lohan would stoop so low. Okay, I can. No I can’t. I can’t believe that anyone would drag someone who has passed away into one of many family fights. By now we all know that Michael Lohan is being his usual douche bag self and selling any taped conversations that he and his daughter, Lindsay Lohan, had to everyone and anyone who will take them. This is bad enough. Really, who the hell tapes conversations that they have with their kid? But he’s taken it to a whole new level now by dragging Heath Ledger into it. Does he have no idea what the word ‘respect’ means?! Okay, forget I said that.

Radar Online now has a taped conversation in which Dina Lohan, Lindsay’s mom tells Michael that Lilo was dating Heath Ledger when he died, even though that relationship was secret. And according to the tapes, Lindsay was pretty messed up when he died. Well, yeah. Hell, I was pretty messed up when Heath Ledger passed away! I think everyone was! The point is, I don’t understand why this matters, or how Michael Lohan thinks that leaking the tapes is going to help his daughter. Mind you, Radar Online hasn’t stated whether Michael gave them the tapes or not but, come on. I think we all know how those tapes fell onto the Radar website. From US,

“At the time of his untimely death in January 2008, actor Heath Ledger was romantically involved — in secret — with Lindsay Lohan. So says her mother, Dina, in an undated, recorded phone conversation with Michael Lohan, her ex-husband and Lindsay’s father.
In a newly revealed recording at Radar, Dina tells Michael that their eldest daughter “was dating Heath when he died . . . I don’t know if you know that, but I know cause I would drop her off and they were friends, very, very close.”

And Ledger’s death devastated the actress, now 23. “That f***ed her up,” her mother says.

Ledger died at age 28 on January 22, 2008 from an accidental, toxic combination of prescription drugs; he had recently separated from girlfriend, actress Michelle Williams, mother of their daughter Matilda, now 4.
Understandably, the presence of the self-destructive Brokeback Mountain actor made Dina Lohan nervous for her own child’s fate.

“When she’s drunk or takes an Adderall with it she will do something like Heath Ledger did in a second without thinking,” she tells her ex-husband on the tape.

She also expresses concerns about Lindsay’s then-relationship with Samantha Ronson, and wonders if her daughter has the wherewithal to walk away. “It’s very easy for a rational person to say. But for an irrational person who has a problem with her DNA and alcohol and Adderall and asthma and every other things she’s got wrong with her.”
For her part, Lindsay Lohan has recently criticized her father for leaking other tapes of private phone conversations. “He’s disgusting to do this,” she wrote on Twitter. “It really hurts my mom for me and my siblings.”

(Radar has not confirmed whether Michael Lohan provided this newest recording.)”

My question is this – why does this matter? I would certainly be able to see Lindsay dating Heath. They both liked to party, they both liked to hang around the same people (the fellow partiers of Hollywood), and they were both actors, both around the same age. But I really fail to see how bringing this to light now is going to help Michael reunite with his daughter, or what it even matters. I’m sure that Lindsay was incredibly messed up over Heath’s death, whether they were dating or not. She’s just a messed up kind of girl. But she is right about one thing. Her dad is disgusting to do this.

“Michael Lohan is auctioning the chance to beat him up. Yes, he is offering one lucky bidder the chance to step into the ring with him in a charity boxing match, scheduled for November 24 in New York. After the nastiness with his daughter Sam maybe Sam will challenge him LOL.
Jeff Cohen, who is setting up the match, said
“Anybody who jumps into the ring with Michael Lohan will become famous. Maybe you’ll get one of Lindsay Lohan’s ex-boyfriends who will try and impress her by beating up her father. “Who knows? You might get Samantha Ronson trying to put a bid in there.”
Michael himself has a dream sparring partner in mind, saying: “Out of all the people on this planet, if there is one person, who I would really love to get the ring with me, it would be Perez Hilton.”

This is just the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard. Why does Michael think that he’s some huge superstar when really we all know that he is just one more parent trying to exploit his daughter until it makes him as much money as possible. Charity my butt! The only charity this man is interested in is the kind that is doled out to him!

Meanwhile, Lindsay has more drama surrounding her life as well as she’s about to head into court to support her girlfriend, Samantha Ronson, who has a suit against her former lawyer who misrepresented her in her case against Perez Hilton. Lindsay is scared that some not-so-pretty truths about her will come out in a video deposition and she is begging the courts to not have it put on video because of the havoc it would wreak should the video leak out…which we all know it would if it were made. From Contact Music,

“According to papers obtained by TMZ.com, the actress filed a motion in Los Angeles on Wednesday (8Oct08) protesting a videotaped deposition, because she fears Garbus will question her “about the details of the drugs allegedly found in the car and of her alleged romantic relationship with Ronson.”
The paperwork adds that Lohan is concerned the tape will be leaked online and cause her “unwarranted annoyance, embarrassment, oppression, undue burden and expense.”
She is also requesting a private location for the deposition, that there are minimal witnesses present and that any transcript of her words is kept secure.”

I can actually understand Lindsay’s fear and think that it’s perfectly reasonable that none of it is put onto video. I understand that celebrities should be treated like anybody else but I think this is a case where she makes a good point and I think the courts should grant it to her. But if Sam really hates Perez Hilton enough to take him to court, you would think that Michael would like him a little bit more.

“Michael told ABC News late Thursday: “She’s (Lohan) gone from making $7 million to less than a million a movie.

“Who’s out of control? I go to church. I go and help people in rehab. That’s control. How can she say I’m out of control?”

He adds, “I want Lindsay to be in a good place. When I started looking at what Samantha was doing, dragging Lindsay to clubs, drinking around Lindsay… Samantha is one of the biggest problems in her life.”

“That’s what Dina told me. I’m reacting on what Dina said, but then Dina steps out of the picture because she wants to look like the good guy.”

“Dina’s a two-face. She wants to try to look good and stay on Lindsay’s good side instead of being a good parent. I don’t give two hoots about my relationship with Lindsay as a friend. One day she’s going to turn around to me and tell me, ‘Daddy, you were right’.”

Michael, several things are wrong with this.

1.) I’m fairly certain Lindsay will not come back and say that you’re right.

2.) Although you may not care about your friendship with your daughter, you should care about your relationship with her as your daughter – which you don’t. Trust, loyalty, a sense of being there for each other are all elements of friendship but you must have them in a parental role as well.

3.) If you’re so insistent on making us all think that you don’t see dollar signs when you look at Lindsay, stop telling us all what she makes!! And then act disgusted by it!!

4.) Going to church and helping people in rehab are both good things. Neither means that you have control or that you’re a good father.

5.) It was once Samantha entered the picture that the bar and public drunk scenes were taken out of it.

I would think that someone who was so ripe on getting the media involved would prepare something to say that made a little more sense and was a little more mature.

“I really don’t want to say anything because I feel like he wins. ‘He’ being the man who is so desperate for attention that he goes to the media whenever possible. I know I am being used, I am just a pawn – easy to sacrifice to feed his addiction. I am not standing in his way – I am not the reason he has no contact with his daughter – he is. His need to throw a tantrum for the whole world to hear is.”

Lindsay also wrote on her own blog saying that her dad was “out of control” and she also clearly indicated that he is not in her life because she chooses it to be that way. In other Lohan news, Lindsay’s grandfather passed away today and Michael has seized it as yet another opportunity to launch attack on his former family. Instead of saying how much the man will be missed and that he will forever live on in their hearts, this is what Celebrity Rights quoted Michael as saying,

“My father just, literally, died in my arms. I notified all my kids and my lawyer notified Dina’s attorney. Let’s see if she has the decency and respect to bring my kids to the wake and funeral. THIS will show her true colors!

“Thus, not even a call. But that’s par for the course with Dina! She didn’t even send a card or visit when he was sick.”

It’s pretty clear what Michael’s intentions are and whether you like Lindsay or you hate her, one can’t help but feel sorry for her for having such a horrible father. It’s always too bad when the parents get more caught up in the fame-hype than the children but this seems to be a case of the extreme.

“I’m not happy,” he says. “Ever since [Lindsay] got out of rehab and all these people came back into her life, things haven’t been right … People like Samantha Ronson don’t need to be around Lindsay. She shouldn’t be dragging Lindsay around nightclubs. Who was Samantha Ronson before Lindsay Lohan? She was nobody. She is using her for her own gain. All these people have inserted themselves into her life like parasites, and it’s not right. I’m done with them.”

Okay, there are a few things wrong with his statement. The first is that two of the people who have used Lindsay’s fame to their own advantage more than anyone are her parents and mostly it has been her father. The second point I’d like to make is that Samantha Ronson has been amazing for Lindsay and not only has Lindsay stayed out of the papers except for a few pics of her filming a movie and this whole “is she or isn’t she gay?” thing, her life has been fairly boring, in comparison of what it was not so long ago. The third very wrong thing about Michael Lohan opening his mouth and showing everyone once again how stupid he is, is the fact that he made this statement just after announcing his engagement. What’s wrong with a divorced man getting engaged? Nothing – except that his fiance, Erin Muller, is 24 years old. That’s a short two years older than his daughter. You know – the one who’s making all the bad choices.

“I love Samantha,” Dina Lohan told reporters. “She’s like a child to me. They’re great friends and as long as my daughter is happy and healthy, it is what it is.” Ronson, wearing her usual skinny jeans and shirt, spun a mix of ’80s tunes and current hits throughout the night, and Lohan, in a slinky multi-colored sequined dress, jammed alongside her. Lohan spent the evening, drink-free, texting friends on her phone, playing with Ronson’s deejay equipment and posing for pictures.”

It’s nice to know that whatever has been said about their family in the past or what her mother has done (and I’m not denying that her parents haven’t always been poster children for good parenting), they can still all come together at the end of the day and want what’s best for each other. I too have said in the past that Samantha seems to be really good for Lindsay and that whatever it is that they’ve got goin on, it seems to be working out for both of them. They are clearly over the moon about each other when they’re together and Lindsay has managed to stay out of the papers for her public intoxication for quite some time. Yep, sounds good to me!

“Michael Lohan says he plans to reopen his divorce against his ex-wife Dina, claiming that she has made it “hard as hell” for him to see their three children.

“I gave her the family house, all the furniture and the $200,000 she owed me just so that I could see my kids and have a relationship with them,” Michael tells New York’s Daily News.

He says Lindsay’s grandparents also haven’t seen their granddaughter “even though my father is dying, and my mother was in a car accident on Easter.

“[Dina] told me, ‘It’s up to the kids if they want to see their grandparents,’” he adds. “But she’s made no effort to put them in touch or make this happen.”

Michael also says Dina’s upcoming E! reality show was — gasp! – his idea.

“It’s the exact same show I pitched,” he claims. “She even used my title.”

On Monday, Michael released a statement to Usmagazine.com, insisting that “Lindsay has NOTHING to do with me opening my divorce case or any other suits that are being filed against Dina.”

He said that “Dina uses people, gets what she wants and then turns her back on them or claims the ideas were hers all along. She thinks the law doesn’t apply to her or her family since they always get away with things and use Lindsay’s name to do it.”"

This is most likely the case, but whoa… Lindsay doesn’t visit her dying grandparents?! Wow, that’s harsh. Right, it is up to Lindsay, who is an adult, and Dina is an idiot who obviously refuses to be held accountable for anything; so why doesn’t this supposedly reformed party girl get off her ass and go see her family? Personal issues, maybe. I hope Michael Lohan fries Dina when this case re-opens. I’ve never liked the wench, personally.

“…the judge actually complimented the couple…”

Hours ago, a Long Island just made his final judgment on the divorce proceedings between the Lohans, and granted Dina the terms she had wanted. A source said that the judge actually complimented the couple by saying they had done the right thing for their kids, and for working hard to get the details settled. ….What the hell could this man possibly be talking about? The Lohan kids are practically role models. And parents like those are of course, naturally adept at the job that is parenting. Oh yeah, they’re all real icons of the community.

There has been no mention of what the custody agreement is supposed to look like, and the couple are returning to court next month to settle that end of it, for now.

“We bought this beautiful house in Berlin, and another one I am trying to design myself close to Potsdam.

We already have so many projects waiting and I am trying to travel and get inspiration all over the world and prepare myself.

We also don’t want our kids to go to school in Hollywood – it will be best if they can go to school in Berlin. We love the city. Berlin is so quiet and balanced, away from paparazzi.”

…looks like Angelina is just running away from Jen…

Hm. It sounds to me that after Angelina’s attitude against Brad’s ex-wife; Jennifer Aniston, her stress issues, health problems, that they’re looking for a quick fix to resolve their marital problems. It certainly looks like Angelina is just running away from Jen. Well, if moving across the globe helps, then more power to them, but usually, uprooting just means your dragging your problems with you.

Kelly Osbourne’s secret plans to completely ruin the musical ‘Chicago’ for everyone… 

Rob Schneider gets right back in Dina Lohan’s face, after she was bitching about him impersonating her daughter, Lindsay, on The Tonight Show.

Joe Pesci, the ultimate movie mobster, and Angie Everhart, Sports Illustrated model, and notorious for dating royalty, are … engaged. Weird, eh?

An insane fan reaches up, and grabs Tim McGraw’s crotch; wife Faith Hill goes off on her. Watch the video!

Paris Hilton screws herself, and entire extended family out of their inheritance. 

Kate Moss is still planning on eventually moving away from Pete Doherty. You know, after all the heroin implants they’ve been through together…

Nicole Richie is whisked away to jail for a whopping four days for her DUI charges. I wonder how long before she gets a mysterious illness too?

Britney Spears takes her children for a vacation in Las Vegas without getting Kevin’s permission, as per necessary in their custody agreement; where Britney’s bodyguard beats the hell out of a photographer, and accidentally injures Britney’s toddler.

Bono and Penelope Cruz are getting all snuggly. They weren’t avoiding the spotlight at all; holding hands and smiling at the paparazzi, on Club 55 harbour beach.

Lindsay Lohan’s dead beat dad, Michael Lohan, has to pay Dina Lohan $500 a week. Couldn’t keep that cute Parent Trap act going, huh Lindsay?

Rumer Willis; daughter of Demi Moore and Bruce Willis, was caught in a drug bust in a Maryland hotel. Rumer however, has already been pretty clear about her level of class, when she was photographed eating condoms.

Angelina Jolie is miserable because her movie ‘A Mighty Heart’ was a box office failure, and made a mere $9 million on opening. Look out Brad, before she adopts some more third world babies!

“Stupid Girls” lyrics, by P!nk.