Paris Is Now Dating Short Bus Passengers

Paris And Her Idiot Boyfriend

Paris Hilton‘s rumoured new boyfriend, Tyler Atkins, has what the French call, that certain je ne se quois… Down’s Syndrome. He’s a T-shirt designer from Australia, and the two were spotted canoodling and making out in Malibu last weekend. Of course, just because Paris is making out with a guy, doesn’t mean she’s dating him. He could just be playing a role in one of her more famous movies, i.e. 1 Night In Paris.

Last month, Tyler was interviewed, and told a story about how a very famous girl hooked up with him, and then drugged him, and brought him back home to fornicate with him. With company, according to his story:

“She’s like a full pill-popper … she brought out these pills and because I was drunk I went, ‘Yeah, fuck it – I’ll just have one. Why not? And she gave me like four of these pills that were like Vicodin; they were like Rohypnols or something. Heavy, heavy.”

“And she drugged me, this famous chick. … I woke up in her spa bath with her and her best friend. We were in the spa bath, full-on threesome.”

“I couldn’t find my clothes. I got dropped down on Sunset Blvd. … I had no minutes left on my phone, so I couldn’t call anyone. Looking like a freak in girls’ clothes.”

If you were ever looking for a living thing (no, plants and vegetables don’t count) to compare Paris Hilton‘s level of intellect to, her new boyfriend makes her look like a member of the NASA research team.

Satisfy your morbid curiosity and see Paris Hilton‘s new, special friend in action in the above mentioned video interview.

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#1 Emily on 07.19.07 at 10:28 am

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